I am a Monkey’s Uncle

~* I am a Monkey’s Uncle *~

That’s right folks; I am a Monkey’s Uncle. Truth be told, I am really a Monkeys’ Uncle three times fold! I have three monkeys. There is firstly my oldest niece, my biggest Monkey. Then lastly youngest niece, my littlest Monkey. This leaves, well, my nephew in the middle, who of course is my middlest Monkey! My brother and sis-in-law have bestowed on me two beautiful nieces, the bookends of my monkeys, and an energetic and inquisitive nephew in the middle. To brag a bit, I am their favourite Uncle (ok ok, so I’m their only uncle…let me enjoy my celebrity) and they love being my monkeys. So much so that they take pride in introducing themselves as “hi, I'm [their name] … and I’m UncaBill’s Biggest/Middlest/Littlest Monkey!”

We have played lots of games, but the Monkeys longtime favourite is Hop on UncaBill . This game’s origin begins with their grandmother, yes that would be my Mother. One time when I came out to Tahoe from Colorado to visit, their grandmother told the Biggest Monkey, at that time my only Monkey, to run down the hall and wake me up for breakfast. Monkey #1 took this to mean she should fling open the door, bound across the room in three giant Monkey steps, launch herself into the air and belly flop onto a still slumbering UncaBill. Oh yes, it worked. UncaBill was definitely wakened! … my Mother possesses an uncanny wisdom, though I’m often left to ponder the madness of her methods … This game has grown as more Monkeys became players, and as the Monkeys themselves have grown. Together, the Monkeys can now pull a sleep deprived UncaBill out of bed and half carry, half drag him to the breakfast room.

A couple years ago during one of my journeys, I was staying in Lamai on Koh Samui in the Gulf of Siam. One rainy afternoon I ventured up island to the village of Chaweng. In Chaweng I stumbled across this cute little café/bar just off the beach. I really had to go inside and check it out, if for no other reason than the café’s name – The Three Monkeys – and to see if they had any t-shirts for sale.

It was getting to be around Happy Hour time (well yeah, in Koh Samui Thailand it is pretty much "happy hour" all the time) so as long as I was there, I grabbed a seat at the bar. I order a plate of Monkeys in Bed and a Tiger beer, while the waitress checked on the shirts for me. No, Monkeys in Bed is not made out of monkey meat! It is stalks of celery stuffed with a mixture of spiced chopped prawns. I also had a Sack Full of Monkeys and some Flying Monkeys , the sacks being like Dim Sum and the flying monkeys are the Thai version of Buffalo Wings. The Tiger beer is one of the local Thai beers, medium colour and flavour, it was good with the hors d'œuvres. While all my monkey snacks were being prepared the waitress and I shuffled through the cafe's t-shirts for me to take home as gifts for "my" Three Monkeys. After sorting through almost all the shirts the two of us were able to piece together three different sizes, three different colours, and each with a different saying printed on the back ('cause each of my monkeys is different and unique!).

Here are my three Monkeys:

See No Evil,
Hear No Evil,
Speak No Evil

All wearing their Three Monkeys t-shirts from Koh Samui.